Being Different

I know you already heard about this one, life is short, according to what most people believe life is all about. Everything goes at a much faster phase. I heard a simple message from a certain advertisement over a television accidentally, I never intended to lay my intention to the television during that time but at the very moment I heard the message it really do knock the sense out of me. A simple message but when you dig deeper right into it you will struck how real the possibility that indeed the message was correct. They say that at the very moment you were born that was the last time you will ever felt the freedom of life. Before we go further to that notion. What exactly defy the real meaning of freedom. Political freedom, personal freedom or lets just say life freedom. Let us focus on life freedom. People has a different interpretation what exactly freedom is all about. As we collaborate their individual perception of what freedom is all about. We came with a dominant notion which most people do agree about that freedom is a human natural rights to live in the world that we created. It is his or her ability to share equal rights and opportunity to the world. Recognizing his or her existence as individual in a system in which we all share.

Life is a constant struggle, at the very moment you risen and wake up to smell the first air, you realize that you began to set up a course. You can never achieve a real freedom. Freedom with no boundaries, a wall that will constrict you, responsibility that force you to always comply, decisions that makes you worry all the time, hard work and labor to keep you going. I guest our life mainly evolve on this one until the end. when your were old, probably that is the time you somehow sense the smell of freedom but not for long since expiration is inevitable.

I been searching for so long on how man can gain complete freedom, searching for mans purpose that beyond our comprehension. We live in the tiny world of ours living our own little way engaging the same routine all over again. Its our way of life.

From now own I close my notion for argument, leaving a conclusion that world is a place for imagination to ignite. Fantasy can replace reality to give birth to new ideas to change the world. People with freedom to break the barrier of what is norm to lead towards change. A world where you can discover the essence of life. The world where you can experience the beauty of creation. A world were eccentric ideas and people are accepted to celebrate diversity and indifference.

Make a Smilebox greeting

Make a Smilebox slideshow

Blank Window

I saw a curious man alone in the cold dark room, shivering and wondering while staring at the small window that is slightly open allowing a small gust of wind to slowly creep into the room. It was a full moon, the shadow of the tress in the foreground slowly dominates the room as it lurk throughout the open window as the night grew deeper. The man continuously nodding his head as it is flooded with many thoughts. Not knowing on what to do he simply stare steadily on the bland gray wall. His desperation grew bigger as silence slowly echoing throughout the room. The endless torment inside him slowly consuming the man. He could barely understand the kind of feeling that continuously to hunt him, the fact that no one even care even made it worst. The man suddenly broke as tears fell into his chick. He could no longer bare this feeling that continuously to consume him. Suddenly his body collapse into the bed. Morning pass by, as the light outside slowly dominates the entire wall, the once bland room slowly burst with color as the day illuminates everything. He wake up from his bed trying the forget the nightmare the he felt last night. Trying to compose himself, he tried to began his day normally engaging with the same routine. Knowing the fact that everyday you may not feel the same thing that you had before of waking up with someone who change your life.

It was the coldest month of the year, the shivering cold wind brushing gently, tiny bits of snow began to fall down. It was haft way through the day but it seems the sun has already left. Trees were strip of leaves, the green pasture that once dominate the lush fields slowly fading away, as it freezes like a tundra scenery. The sky is like a blank canvass, the vastness of the emptiness of space make everything seem so gray yet endless. Through my apartment window I saw a man in his long winter clothes clinching his hand on his pocket as he came rushing trying to go indoors. As moment pass I hear I small knock on my door, I was curious who it was and I came swiftly to find out who. As the door creep open I saw a man with a smile on his face. At that moment I knew I was not alone anymore.

Days turns to week and weeks turns to month, as winter finally came to an end, I felt the dawn of the new day finally came to wake me up from this winter days of my life that for a long time had been shielded me to see the warm glow of the sunlight. My nightmares had engulf me for quite so long, how can such a perfect dream turn into nightmare. As each winter comes I still remember the silhouette that keep me warm, but now it has vanish. I never realize that is been years now since the last time I saw him. I still keep staring on the blank window hoping that someday as the last leaves of the tree began to fall, I could see again the man that I saw before on his winter clothes rushing to knock on my door.

When Strangers became friends

When Strangers became friends

In life their are certain things that come in our way that are truly unexpected. Maybe that is the secret that makes life seem so interesting and full of mystery. After saying this maybe I believe now in the saying that "life is like a box of chocolate you never knew what you are going to get". As you move forward towards a new chapter of your life, you began to experience new things, continuously to strive to find your own identity by yearning and discovering things that are consider to be strange for you. As you stroll along the path that you created you never realize or even without your anticipation, in the horizon you will began to see new things lurking and slowly coming your way. Somethings maybe bad and others maybe good, the important is to make a wise decision.

A part of this are people whom sometimes I refer to as stranger, because this is first time I have ever seen them. I never knew whats hidden behind those smile every time they glance at me. Is this a way for them of welcoming and accepting me or a way for them to judge me with discontent for who I am. At first I was afraid to show who I really was, afraid of being judge and afraid of being rejected. I guess I was wrong maybe I'm the one who is being judgmental, already giving my own interpretation of how this stranger will threat me, without even giving them a chance to really show me what they are capable of, I guess I was wrong.

I never realized for such a small period, I lay my guard down and grant those people my unconditional trust. I never felt this much sincerity coming from this people. They are free spirited because they are not afraid to show me their real identity. They are also the most genuine people I have met so far, in time of needs and companion they will not hesitate to volunteer. In addition to that, the simplicity of their personality despite that some of us has strong presence, yet we manage to compose ourselves to lay a common ground and evidently became real friends.

Time really do flies, I never realized that what we shared and experience will simply come to an end, maybe I enjoyed so much that I never realize that its almost over. Even so I'm still grateful that I have an opportunity to meet you throughout the way, I've learned a lot, hoping to see most of you guys someday, and you know we will.

If Only My Life is Like a Living Music

How does a music fanatic like me perceive things through music?

If Only My Life is Like a Living Music I will see the world in a different way
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If Only My Life is Like a Living Music fantasy will replace reality
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If Only My Life is Like a Living Music everything has a different story to tell
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If Only My Life is Like a Living Music the vivid world will be burst with colors
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If Only My Life is Like a Living Music I will inspire the world towards change
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If Only My Life is Like a Living Music I wish I could leave everyday to experience it
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If Only My Life is Like a Living Music life would not be this difficult
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If Only My Life is Like a Living Music the world with be much different
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If Only My Life is Like a Living Music..........

The Reason for are Existence

When you look at the picture of the earth from the sky you will realize of all the planet that surround are very own star called the sun you will realize that earth has such a unique and a distinct vibrancy of color. The splash of bright blue sky that reflect the vastness of water that covered mostly the entire surface of our planet, the contrary of the brown color of the land rich with luscious green colors of the tropics, the snow covered tundra region in the poles, and the bright dessert that covered mostly the continental Africa. It only shows that this planet of ours are timing and abundance of life. Our planet is purely made up of silicon rich based material and oxygen with a metallic core. The presence of oxygen is essential in our planet to hold life and it is the very reason why are planet is very rear for it has richness in life that it evolve to the point of acquiring super intelligence and fortunately that us humans. Millions or even billions of years of evolution our planet has to invest in order to create what we are right now. Throughout the years our planet has experience tremendous changes. Our evolutionary stages comprises of different era, each were able to create species that some of us are not even familiar with, earth also encounter great changes in environmental climate. The earth seem an alienated place million years ago, the oxygen content in atmosphere jumping from 30% below to 30% above than we have today, the modern day landscape doesn't exist. The constant changes in environment causes some species of animals roomed it this planet extinct thus created a new species able to withstand the ever changing planet due to evolutionary and adaptability. We all knew that mammals appears more than 200 million years ago and fist human form believe to appear merely 200k years ago, to know the fact the earth already formed 4 billion ago it only shows that the time of our existence here is not that old if your based it from the age of our planet. Mammals began to sprout when all living dinosaurs died out for know clear reason, other say due to asteroid that hit the earth, but that idea is still consider a theory. If we realize how amazing that despite constant changes that our planet has experience, is still hold life that even evolve into a complex species and gained intellectual being.The process of of death and life is remarkable, we have to appreciate every complex stages of evolution that are planet has undergone. Our existence is the most powerful event that this planet of ours could bring. Our galaxy consists billions of stars, some has a tendency of planet revolving around it, and other might have the tendency to hold any form of life, but a planet that could complex intellectual being is seem so rare and lucid and until now we still consider ourselves to be unique. We still continue to search for an answer if their are being out there who is similar to us or even come closer to our way of thinking do exist, but the answer to that kind of notion will not be in a near future, only time could tell and of course developed a much sophisticated technologies to do the work. Our curiosity has driven us to the out most capability of our intelligence, the more question we have about everything the more we strive to learn something from that, throughout the time without knowing humankind throughout it search for answer has made a significant contribution to the field of science and technology. Ever since, Science is the key solution that man had created to all the answer that been mystify man, about the question "How and Why"?. They try to find ways how to answer those question. In the recent years man has made a remarkable discoveries, and this has a huge impact on how we anticipate everything that surrounds from the galaxies in our universe to smallest organism it seems that we gained understanding the reasons that those exist.

Earth is barely consider a dust when you compare it to other heavenly bodies in our galaxy. Our sun is just one of those billions of stars concentrating in our galaxy alone. Earth birth was simply an accident or coincidence. Earth and other planet evolves around are system is just remnants on excess during the birth of star, mainly formed from dust holds by gravity. Until now the question still remains what is it really the reason were her. The very essence of our existence dictate are purpose on how to use the ability the have been given to us to give meaning, to give understanding and to simplify as much as possible the complexity of our existence.

For My Friends

It's been almost two years now since our graduation, I have no idea that times really do flies. Without knowing that its almost two years since the last time that all of us bond together in a complete group. I never realize that change always keep us apart, I guess everything has to be that way, everything always has an end. Then we realize at the dawn of the day that we are now beginning to experience the new chapter of our life were we has to make decision for our self and decide what choices we had to make. After all, it is the point in our life were we began to paint the blur vision of our future. I never realize that life without you guys seem so bland, the colorful memories we had before are now turning sour. Well I guess as what they say, as you move forward you need to leave something behind along the way. First day of college seems so cruel and cold for me to realize you knew nothing at all, adjust in a new environment and meet new strangers in your life, but because of you guys it made my college life more enjoyable and adventurous.

What left is the colorful memory we all had shared before, the funny jokes, sad moments and all the accomplishment that we achieved together for the past four years, its the only things that reminds me of how important all of you had been in my life to developed me as person. I will certainly going to miss all of those. Hoping those things that I have learned when I'm with you guys is enough for me to stroll alone on the path of my destiny. I'm grateful that in my way I was able to meet people who has so may distinct personality, yet manage to have some common ground and evidently became my real friends.

To my friends, thank you is all I can say, because you made my college life so interesting that through out the time, I made such a huge progress for myself and I'm glad you were a part of it. You came to know who really I am, yet tried to accept me for who I am despite of how many flaws I have. Well at this point of time, thank you again! is all I can say for such a wonderful memories all of you left behind, hoping to see most of you again at some point of time.

Broken Heart


Its been almost two years now since the last time I hear your sweet voice, but it seems everything is still fresh to me. You have no idea how much I miss your company. The sweet moments we shared before is difficult for me to forget, still hoping that someday I may still experience that again. I have no idea if ever I could fall in love again. I was hurt really bad that till this day, I still fell the pain slowly aching inside me. Until this day I still have no idea how can I puzzle back again the shattered pieces of my heart cause I know you still have the missing pieces.

I was hurt really bad, everyday a tear drops slowly into my eyes without knowing when it it will ever going to end. Every time i remember you intense sadness came in to me, telling myself how can such a beautiful experience did not live long, and obviously it died along, maybe I died along with it. As day pass bye the reminiscence of your face slowly blurring away, slowly being carried away by my tears. I'm afraid that someday maybe I will forget everything about you, and one of the best thing that happened to me will simply become a memory. I'm sad, is this how is it going to an end, everything we had will simply be thrown out into an oblivion.I felt stupid that I let myself to fall apart like this,without knowing how and when I will survive from this trap.Its sorrowful but I guess this really how it suppose to be.

Years have gone bye..the only memory I lift with you is slowly flushing away. The sound of your voice, your sweet smile, your tantalizing eyes is fading away in my vision. Sometimes heart gets tired and fed of longing that you will ever comeback, I guess I'm wrong. I'm slowly moving on, sewing up the pieces of my turn heart along the way. I'm letting you go now, I will never ever make the same mistake again, it's time for me to be happy again even without you, as day broke by its important that we should keep moving forward no matter what....despite of I'm still grateful for everything because it made me even stronger person both inside and outside......

How to be HAPPY! :-)

1. Positive thoughts! We all knew that stress can cause many problems in your life, it could effect you mentally, physically and spiritually as well. We have to understand the fact that stress can cause by so many factor. One of the major causes of stress is when you are worrying a lot about certain things in your life. We have the tendency sometimes of thinking so many things like how to be good next time, how to be perfect, try not commit mistakes and etc. This thoughts could be very exhausting to the point that it will lead to stress. It is really important for us to get rid of this thoughts. We doesn't need to pressure ourselves to do good all the times. Just learn to recognize that this situation are natural, the best way is simply, lighten up and assess yourself whether you have the power to improve the situation. Having the positive thoughts all the time could lead to being an optimistic person. People like this usually threat any situation that may come their way as simply a challenge and may find ways to coup with that in a much positive manner.


2. Dealing with situation. We all knew that everyday were are facing a lot of challenges in our life neither good nor bad. The important is how you were able to coup with that. Obstacles always come our way-its a normal part of life. Avoid starting to look down on your self and thinking negatively about your situation. Every failure is like a learning device that enables to correct our mistakes and avoid committing the same mistakes. Learn that everything doesn't have to be perfect all the time, just try to make the best out of every situation that you in.



3. Be Patient. trying to achieve everything within twenty minutes, or just a day, may not work out as perfectly as you guessed. Committing yourself to this lifestyle takes some serious reflection and perhaps, change within yourself, which will take longer periods of time - so wait for the changes, as they will be worth it.


4. Learn to love yourself. other people say you could never learn to love others not unless you love yourself. Learn to love yourself and the rest will follow. Learn to appreciate all of the good things that happened in your life or even appreciate all of the good things that you have done rather than focusing and blaming for that bad things that you have did.Remember nobody is perfect. People don't change constantly it requires a long process, the important is your continuously working on it.Try to pursue goals that will make you happy. Keep on working things that you love the most. Just learn to appreciate yourself despite of how many flaws you have.
   


5. Be active with your interpersonal life. Develop an active and healthy relationship with other people. Their is no better way to learn more about the world than talking to other people rather than watching television alone in your house. Being active socially means able to interact with other people, able to relate your problems and able to share your opinion. Go out and explore the worlds, their are so many things outside that we need to learn and experience rather than confining yourself within your boundary. As what they say always expand your horizon. Be able to have friends and maintain your relationship by keeping in touch, making an effort and enjoying your time with whoever the person is. Support each other through hard times, rejoice in the good moments and together be thankful for the friendship and love you share.

GAY MARRAIGE Yes or no?

Their are many debate right now about gay marriage especially here in Asia were most country are still very conservative although some of them already adhere to the westerners influence and culture just like here at my native country Philippines.

I think Its times for me to share my point of view about this one. Although my opinions really doesn't count at all, anyway I just want to express or voice my opinion about this one. Being a christian and and also as a gay, which I'm proud of that by the way, its a little bit contradictory for my part, on which side I think I' m going to support. The gay community and the church are two very different institution who are opposing to the idea of gay marriage, of course. When listened to both party,their is point where I tends to question my credibility on which side a going to affiliate with. I think both of them has a valid reasons.

I believe that christian community, (obviously), strictly opposes to the idea of gay marriage, because they tend to protect the sanctity of marriage between men and women only. When I was in grade school we have a class during the end of are afternoon period, sometimes we called it us the religious class. I just remember that are teacher, which is a nun by the way, about the story in the bible in which she shared with us, that their wan once a city who allowed marriage between same sex, anyway to make the story short, it was destroyed by a rain of fire that engulf the entire and the people turn into salt. Back then I'm still a bit young and innocent, I have no idea about the concept of what being gay is a all about, as far I know it was being taught as something immoral. Being a kid and gay, is really difficult back then, I get bullied a lot , me and my father doesn't have a good relationship because of being like that. It is really difficult to express how I felt, when less people could really understand you. Sometimes I felt that already change my interpretation of what gay is all about, and wishing I was born straight. I felt that maybe it really something bad, and I should choose to stop. The problem is being gay is not a choose but rather is really who you are. You cant change because people wanted you to, anyway its not about them it always about me me me!!!....

Well thank goodness that was back then, now I change my belief completely, I'm very grateful that society become less ignorant and become more open minded that we do exist, we have special roles in every part of the society were we belong. According to the gay community that gay marriage should be consider to be valid and should receive a blessings from the church. They believe that love is such universal and powerful that it may take different forms, and every one has the opportunity and the freedom to embrace that no matter what. I do believe and agreed both of their opinions.

Well I think its time for me to give my own idea about this. Its really difficult for me on which side to stand, as I aid before because as I christian and as I gay. I certainly do believe that we should respect the highest rule and the teaching of are church, we should respect the sanctity of marriage between men and women under the rule of GOD, which is consider to be important to ensure everyone attain right values and conduct. We should adhere to standard practice of what marriage is all about. In defense for the gay community. I believe that no one in this world has the right to judge gay people and certainly they have no right to stop their freedom to commit the rights towards marriage. We knew that love is such a universal thing, seeing two people in love is so powerful no matter what forms they maybe, and we have no right to contradict to that. For short we have no right to judge others, we have no right to dictate other people on what they do. Everyone has the right or entitled to bind their love to each other. Stop all of this hatred and time for us to be more acceptable. It doesn't mean that what is beyond normal already consider a taboo.

I agree the right of people towards marriage especially for us gays, but at the same time we have to respect the teachings of our church. All I wanted is for people to be able validate the gay marriage so that any couple has the right to live a normal life in their state, the idea that you are being recognize, the ability towards legal partnership legitimize by the laws. As I have heard some of this has already been done is some state, which I'm happy because it only shows that we are moving towards the world of acceptance. Love and Peace to the world.

About me!!!!


Hi! my name is Mark Anthony De los Santos, some people used to call me, mark but I prefer being called Anthony because when I look up the origin of my name over the net, mark signifies rebellious, that's the kind of personality that I really don't want to go into or perhaps even being refer to, although sometimes I am, just kidding!! , anyway because of that I simply prefer being called Anthony instead which means "worthy of praise" maybe..HAhaha!!...Anyway I just recently turned 21 last December. I'm a bit sad because I could not believe I'm getting older, probably me still wanted to be such a big baby, it always give you an excuse to do anything you want. I always consider myself to be young at heart as what they say, but certainly I'm happy that I reach the age which is consider to be the transition from adolescence to adulthood..21 for me means more responsibility, how irony , It only means one thing that I need to do things on my own now, time to start planning for my future, after all, I have a lot of things plan ahead of me. Sometimes I'm a bit worried because at this point time I'm still a bit confused of what I really wanted for my future. I really don't know were to begin. I have so many ambition in my life, way to many that I'm afraid that maybe I might no be able to achieved at least some part of it, hoping not, well i still have faith left in me, Anyway enough of that.
Well what else, by the way did I mention that I'm still single, although its sad to admit the fact that I'm still single but what else I can I do when in fact its true, and still really have no idea why, sometimes I ask myself is their something wrong with me?... hoping none...anyway even thought I'm single, I try not to worry about it because my main focus right now is really more about how to jump start my career, its really my main priority before my love life. I still have many things that I need to prove first before finally realizing that I'm ready to fell in love, hoping when that time comes I'm still on my 20's hahaha!!!....OK what else? hmmm!..about me, my character, my attitude.....let me think????...I believe that I'm a kind of person that when you first saw for the first time, you will realize that I'm a bit timid and shy, but no worries, it doesn't mean that I'm not approachable and friendly type of person, the truth is I'm friendly, really! for sure!...the reason that I tend not be vocal to any person that I recently meet because I'm a kind of person who wanted to observe first, whether that kind of person share the same ideas, passion and believes in life as I do. If that's the case then certainly we are going to be a best buddy...

With my best friends, I am very open I tend to share a lot about my personal life because I believe I could trust them to keep some details "secret"..:-), anyway I also talk a lot to the point that I'm bit annoying or being nonsense maybe its my way of stirring up the mood of the crowd because I really hate to be a part of the boring group, as what they say "Be Happy even thought theirs nothing to be happy about because that what makes life beautiful"..agree? or maybe not?... I am a very a passionate person, I get so easily emotional in a lot of things, from watching a drama movie to even seeing people cry, make me fell sad also, maybe it only shows that I' am kind heart ed?..I guess so..just kidding maybe the exact word for that probably be lighthearted..correct?..My motto in life is "keep moving forward" is this a bit a familiar to you?, if it is maybe you a already watch the movie, "Meet the Robinson's" from Disney. After I have watch the movie, it really inspire me a lot in certain way that it changes my outlook in life.
I'm a kind of person who willing to be active as much as possible everyday. It feels that I need to do something productivity, I don't want a day passing by without doing nothing, for short, I need to be active all the time. Probably it explains much why I choose that kind of motto after all
I'm kind of person who willing to do something positive everyday, for myself and to people that surrounds me. It give me a sense of accomplishment that you deed something good.My greatest dream in life that before I die, is for me to able to make such a huge impact to the society or even perhaps the world that may change people perception towards a betterment, Wow what an ambition, I know its a bit to much for a guy like me who are still on the process on choosing what steps I make in becoming much closer to my ideal path, however it serve as an motivation that somehow, at least I try without knowing that I are already making progress.I really have many passion in life and unfortunately still adds up. I would like to become a fashion designer someday, haha! out of nowhere!..anyway I just love the lifestyle of being a part of the socialite, the opportunity to engaged in so many people is really the kind of things that I wanted to do, just like in FTV the fashion channel, aside from that, I'm more in touch with my creative mind, I like to keep myself being creative all the time. For me creativity is like my identity, that is what I'm destined me to do, really, a bit funny but its true, its my relief from the strees that life could bring..Hahha! How I wish that I could start at this very moment in achieving my goals, because I promise myself that 10 years from I'm going to be successful and made such an incredible accomplishment that my family or friends could be proud of me, and don't forget the people, HAHaha! Well I already share a lot of things about me, if only time could give their are really a lot things that I would like to share, anyway at least somehow you have now an idea who is ANTHONY all about...

Jossele finally back here in iloilo, althought it just a short period of time because she has to comeback in manila again to work but we really enjoyed a lot..

Farewell to my friends

Farewell party Its the very last picture we had before we finally go our separate ways I know it a bit a sad but I"m excited for our future Good luck everyone, hope we could still see each other in the future mwahh!!!!!!

You can see on the picture from top row left to right
erwin: too silent for a guy, sarte(the one who is sitting):the comical, jenny: dont talk a lot that I could barely know him, Omyr: unpredictable, brian: the business mogul, joselle: risk taker and opinionated, tinay: the leader, marlowe(the last guy on the right side): always hiding something. from the back right to left joan: the dreamer, emilyn:rebellious but friendly, ellisenic: the sweet one and has a good voice too, gelyn: always been such an old maiden waiting for her prince, hehe!, mark(me of course), you already kow me hehe!, honestly I'm the lonely and ambitous one hehe!, armin( my ex) just kidding! haha! the cool guy..